D: What’s my teudat zehut number?
G: You don’t have one. You have a subcutaneous electronic chip. Why?
D: The driver’s license application asks for my teudat number.
G: Kulfi, sweetheart, you can’t get a driver’s license.
D: What? Why not?
G: Animals are not permitted to drive.
D: You drive.
G: OK, to be more precise, nonhumans are not permitted to drive.
D: What about self-driving cars?
G: Oy, I can see this is going to be difficult.
D: Besides, I can see better than you can.
G: True, but…
D: And my hearing is like way better.
G: I’m sorry?
D: And my reflexes against yours, we’re talking wipeout.
G: Nolo contendere.
D: Plus, I can read and speak French.
G: Well, now that makes absolutely no difference.
D: It does if you’re driving in Montreal or Paris.
G: Look, only humans can get a driver’s license. It’s a matter of…safety.
D: Sounds like speciesism to me.
G: It is what it is.
D: Unfair! The three-year-old kid next door drives a firetruck.
G: Oh…I see. You mean that red plastic thing with the silver bell?
G: Ah, so what kind of car are you thinking about?
D: How about a red 1966 Shelby AC Cobra convertible?
G: Come on buddy, let’s head to the toy store. I see a car in your future.
D: Wheeee Doggies! Spring little Cobra…
HEY LITTLE COBRA – The Rip Chords: https://youtu.be/oc6FmZCT0Zc
Photo: 1966 Shelby AC Cobra photographed in Laval, Quebec, Canada at the Auto Classique Laval.